Thursday, January 6, 2011

Busy Bee gets to preachin'


Knitting projects.

Headband ideas and prototypes.

Photographing items for etsy, putting on piles of makeup for said photos, because, honestly, who's gonna buy something to wear on their head if they don't know what it might look like on an actual head? and who's gonna buy it if they think it might make them look like a harried, exhausted, lined mother of three? So yeah, lots of makeup.

These things are time consuming, I've realized. Ha, ha. Especially when I try to squeeze it all into the child-free moments! It makes me feel a smidge insane. Have I mentioned how I don't multitask well? Mm-hmm, I don't. Not a good trait in a person who has got 3 kids, a home, a tiny part-time job, and a husband, all of which need attention. I don't want a nanny, a cleaning lady, or a personal chef (ok, so it might be nice to have a cleaning lady or a chef), I just want to do all of my jobs well. In the past, something has always suffered when I try to excel at everything. So I have always just tried to prioritize. But I don't really think that should look like me doing one thing well (e.g. parenting, OR house cleaning), while everything else goes to pot.

I long to be the wife of proverbs, who manages her household so skillfully and wisely! And I want to be a loving and wholly available mother. That certainly has to come before all the chores and tasks. I also want to take care of my husband. I can sometimes fail in that department, because I have these three kiddos, and he's an adult. It's easy to neglect him, but he really does need attention as much as the little ones. He may not need me to get him a band aid or put him down for a nap, but he really feels loved when I do little things like get his lunch together, make the morning coffee, and put my current project down for a while and give him my full attention while he tells me about his day.

I think that Moms sometimes forget that being a wife, and parenting together must come before mothering. At least that's how I feel about it. If you neglect your marriage because you're too busy being a Mommy, what will be left when the kids are more independent? Ok, I'm off the soapbox. I'm blessed to be married to my best friend, and I want to be aware of how my actions or lack of actions affect Dan. Perhaps I'm getting all preachy because we are going to the first night of a 13 week marriage group tonight. It should be really good. I'm excited to focus on myself and Dan and God for a couple of hours.

All this to say that I feel as though I am making some progress. I am staying somewhat on top of daily tasks, and trying to really be present with my children and my husband. And my accountability buddies are on board to help me, which makes me so excited and happy. I think there is one more area, though, in which I need a kick in the pants... I am thinking and praying about who I should ask to kick me on a regular basis. More about that later.

2 comments:

Jessica said...

Progress is wonderful. And actually feeling it? That's even better. I am happy for you, Emily. You say many good things here, on this blog. I love reading it. If you wrote a book, I'd love to read that, too, by the way. Happy 1-1-2011!

Emily said...

Jess, thank you. And yes, feeling the progress is amazing. this year feels like a significant one for me and for change... Happy 2011 to you, too!